[This was written while PMS'ing.. I have no idea why I wrote it, or where I was.. but I felt the need to actually publish it so that it would be here.. ]
I would like to blame all of this on Florence but I know better. It’s all me. Why can’t I just accept responsibilities for my actions?! smh. Of course I have to blame every little thing on a man who has somehow done ME wrong and I had absolutely nothing to do with it.
I don’t recognize the person in the mirror anymore. What happened to me? Whatever happened to Bee?! Whatever happened to Brittney?! I miss me terribly. I just want to be HER again. Idk how I let her slip away so easily.. but I did. How can you not even recognize your own reflection?
I used to be so cute to me… Now I’m critiquing everything I see. I hate my body. I hate my hair. I hate everything. blah blah blah.
Dear Me,
There are a few things I’ve realized about you, me. You’re never good enough. Change that, please. Quit believing everything these men tell you. They’re most likely just lying and you fall for it each time. Find a single guy that’s actually available to you—I mean how much longer can you even entertain these fools with baby mamas, girlfriends, fiancées, wives, main chicks etc… They are toxic. Girl…
Stop being so lazy. You’re capable of wayyyy more than you think.
Get used to sleeping alone. I mean, I know you’re “used to it” but begin to like it. I have a feeling you will be sleeping alone for a few more years.
Stop partying so much. I know why you drink. I know why you like to get fucked up. It’s not healthy dear… Do we need an intervention??
You will probably always be the fat friend, even if you aren’t fat. I don’t think you’re fat though; It’s just that your friends are so small & skinny. You could stand to lose a few pounds though. Just work harder babe, okay?
Don’t be afraid to speak up and be heard. I know you have much more to say. Just SAY IT!
There’s more to life than sex, men, your body & your hair. Stop talking about it so much.
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