Texas Independence Day

Today is Texas Independence Day.. & I almost feel like my heart is independent from him. Almost. I am trying to become the best me man. And that can only come if I am free from him. 100%. Why am I still somewhat attached. We tried the love thing. Didn't work. Tried the friends only thing. Didn't work. Even tried to mix sex with friendship-- & that failed miserably. I eventually grew tired of things. I felt horrible forever. So much other shit I HAD to deal with... on top of bullshit involving him. I reached the breaking point. I let go. He let go first though. I can admit that. I just made it all official. I am trying to go 30 days without contacting him. It takes 30 days to get over someone.... i heard at least. So this is day.. 6? Yes. Almost a week. It's crazy. Let's go.

So is today MY physical Independence Day? I mean, it definitely isn't a mental one. Ah. I cannot wait until March 25th. That will be the true test. Until then. No more.

It's rather strange... I've not really been communicating with anyone lately. No men. Barely communicating with my friends. Slowly becoming me again though. I need this break away from people so bad. If I only I could tell you EVERYTHING that has been going on with me. Damn. I tried though. I tried my best. I gave it all I had. You cannot say I didn't do that. When I'm there, I'm all in. I'm not even heartbroken. I'm just here.

Straight Hair Bee

my hair finally touches my back!!! & it's actually curled here :):):)

the front of my hair is past my shoulders!

BeePac's Back!

After about 3 months of no cable or internet services (outside of my cellular phone), BeePac's BACK! OMG! It feels sooo amazing to be able to blog from my living room again.! I know, I know.. I haven't done much blogging this year. Why? 2012 has been all about change & renewal. Eliminating toxic individual & practices out of my life.

I feel like my life is changing for the better & its only up from here. *praises*

So... stay tuned for a photo montage of what you've missed out on the past couple of months.

First Post of 2012

Please forgive me! Life has taken over and I have found myself on the freaking twenty-seventh of January writing my FIRST blog entry of the year. SMH. I should be ashamed of myself. Who does this? Me of course. I have been so busy trying to stay.... sane. Yup. That's pretty much it. Just stay sane. So much shit has happened lately.. Idk where to begin........

My BFF Brooke gave birth to my goddaughter Brooklynn Alyse on January 9, 2012. She weighed 7lbs 6oz & she absolutely ADORABLE! I am so in love. I had baby fever for a minute but after taking care of her by myself last night--- yea. I'm definitely over the baby fever. The little mulatto princess sneezed breastmilk alllll over my face. lol.

Grr... so much has happened. I'm sleepy. I shall write later on tonight. Big things will happen in 2012. Mark my words.