Saturday, July 31, 2010

How To Remain in Friend Request Purgatory

Have a profile pic of you in your bathroom mirror with your shirt off pointing a gun at me -_-. No, we cannot be friends. AT all. 

Hello... Goodmorning.

Sober Tales

Partied hard last night. Actually had fun for the first time being 100% sober. No alcohol, no drugs-- just music and great people. Random guys on me. Random girls hating. For some odd reason I felt like we were all involved in an intense game of "i bet you won't step in my square". I wanted to punch her. I wasn't even on it gahhhh. They were playing all these fight songs. I mean when you hear "Keep My Name Out Cho Mouth" what else do you do but scream "& put my dick up in it" in unison with the rest of your Huntsvillian pals?? Girlfight didn't help either. And for some strange reason I was dancing. Shaking my ass. Poppin it on a handstand. Okay maybe not poppin it on handstand but you know..

The benefits of being sober? I woke up this morning at 7am. I wasn't tired. My eyes weren't puffy or red. Makeup wasn't smeared down  my face. I wasn't horny last night (at least not ridiculously horny like "i need dick now"). I wasn't sweaty and stinky. My makeup didn't run. I didn't fall down. All in all it was a pretty bomb ass night. Can't wait to party sober AGAIN :)

Friday, July 30, 2010

I Finally Love My Hair

I had very short hair when I was a kid because my mother decided to perm my hair when I was 4. She cried after it fell out but it didn't stop her from perming it again while I was in elementary school.

 I was NEVER allowed to touch my hair at all after that because it was her own little mission to grow my hair back. I always wanted to have bangs but my mother forbid it. I'd get in trouble all the times because my mother would catch me in the bathroom with scissors in hands trying to cut my hair myself (I was a rebellious child). Then I started to notice that my best friend had beautiful long, thick, coal black hair. I wanted hair like hers. Her mother told my mother of another lady who pressed her but she used marcel irons instead of the dreaded hot comb. She even mixed up her own hair grease! This lady was notorious in town because she had "growing hands" as the old folks called it. She had the ability to grow every little black girls hair she touched. I was 11 then. I had my hair pressed every two weeks. Every time she'd press my hair, she would clip a little bit of my relaxed ends off. Soon I was completely relaxer free and had long hair.

Everyone loved my hair. Old women would compliment my mother on how long her daughter's hair was and how "coal black" it was (I guess that was a sign of healthy hair). I honestly hated getting my hair pressed. I had long hair now so I began to wean away from the presses by getting my hair braided up during the summer just so I could swim in peace without hearing my mother's mouth. I grew tired of my greasy hair as I entered middle school as well. I wanted my hair to swing like my white classmates and never understood why my hair never seemed to hold a curl and was so thin & limp looking. Of course the only remedy I could come up with was to get another relaxer. My own choice! I was in the 8th grade now AND a cheerleader so I should be able to make my own decisions. So I got another relaxer. A couple of months later my mother finally let me get my hair cut in cute layers so my hair was just past my shoulders. I LOVED it! I took so many pictures that day because my hair was so bouncy and shiny. I had white girl hair! It looked so good that soon all of my friends said that I thought I was "All That" because I got my hair done. I didn't care though because I looked good.

In high school I finally had more control over my hair. I cut it all the time so it never really grew past shoulder length. I even go the bangs I longed for. I wore bangs all through high school but something else happened. My hair stopped growing. I even stopped cutting my hair but it just continued to break off. To hide the fact that my hair wasn't growing every year I'd just cut it a bit shorter. By senior year my hair was barely past my chin! Then came my addiction to weave. It looked so good most people didn't even realize it was fake. I faked my short hairedness until I went to college.

I was in Atlanta with barely any money (spent most of it ordering out and shopping) so of course my hair was barely done. With relaxed hair you just can't skip out on the shop as I did so of course my hair still broke off. Luckily I found a chick on campus who did $30 sew ins so I was in heaven for awhile until I couldn't even afford that. I wore my hair "natural" like for two days in Atlanta by not flat ironing it after I washed it so everyone saw my wavy hair and asked "what happened?" Guys even called me mother earth & Jill Scott & Ms. Afrocentric and of course I quickly straightened my hair. One guy who I was so in love with (or so I though) even told me that I wasn't pretty with my short hair. He preferred me with long weave and asked me why I didn't grow my hair out. This was the final straw. On October 10, 2008 I went to the beauty shop and decided to cut all of my hair off like Rihanna just to prove to him and everyone else that I was indeed beautiful with short hair.

That same month I learned that my friend Megan had a form of alopecia caused my relaxers and heat damaged and had began balding at the age of 20! Then I learned that I'd have to get my hair "touched up" every 2 weeks now since it was cut short. I was certain that I'd eventually go bald too! Luckily Megan decided that she was going to "go natural" and read online about all these ways to transition and even joined a few sites. I didn't get my hair relaxed again but I still kept it up by getting the back shaved completely off and letting the front grow out since it was easier to straighten.

By April of 2009, the flat ironing went out the window. I washed my hair one day and felt the cutest spirals forming where I'd shaved my hair off! It was beautiful! I went into the bathroom, grabbed a pair of scissors and cut the majority of my relaxed ends off. No thought at all. I was completely natural after 6 months of unintentional transitioning.

My mother hated my natural hair. She didn't understand why I wouldn't perm it. She even told me I wouldn't go bald but her thinning crown made me think otherwise. My dad didn't like the fact that my hair wasn't "done". They even asked me did I turn into a lesbian at college because I wore my hair in a short fro. To appease my mother I picked up a hot comb and slathered greased all over my hair and tried to press it myself. The results were horrible. My hair was fried! I literally saw clumps of hair fall out as I tried to press it. I ended up having to cut my hair even shorter in the front to get rid of the damage. Someone then convinced me to get a wavy weave since I loved my curls so much. I did and I got so many compliments. My parents exclaimed "We have our daughter back" and guys began to talk to me more but I hated the weave after two weeks so I took it down again. No one understood why I would purposely not look my best.

For a few months I didn't like to go out anywhere. I didn't feel pretty and the people around me made sure of it. I heard the meanest things from people. Someone even wrote an anonymous message to me saying something along the lines of "why are you trying to go natural? You don't have GOOD Hair! You're not mixed!" After that when I was so close to relaxing my hair again I visited my friend back in Atlanta with natural hair. By then I had another long weave in. My friend had recently BC'd and her hair was gorgeous! It was so thick and we began to talk about our hair and how people react to us now. She was absolutely stunning to me. She owned her naturalness and I felt like maybe I should too. My last day at her house I decided to take down my weave and let her see my real hair. She inspired me so much. I felt like I didn't have to hide my natural hair anymore. She was basically forced to go natural and she embraced it.. Why couldn't I embrace it by choice?

I am proud to say that after two years of intense soul searching I finally love all of me- including my hair. I love the different textures. I love that people stop me and question me about my hair. I love the fact that some even think its a weave or that I have some sort of chemicals in it to make it look curly. No, its 100% me. I wish that I would have embraced it earlier because my hair has suffered a lot of damage from lack of care on my part. I have horrible split ends that I must deal with now and of course the front is growing at a faster rate than the back-- but I love it. I've even inspired other girls in my small Texas town to put down the creamy crack and embrace their natural, nappy roots.

Now, this doesn't mean that I have thrown away my flat iron and weave collection. I still plan on doing that after I've become bored with my twist outs. I just now know how to properly care for my hair. Natural hair isn't always healthy hair and that is the main thing I had to learn. I have experienced so much growth but I can only imagine the outcome if I'd done more protective styles and not slept with my hair out every night and actually used products that were designed to cater to natural hair. I even altered my diet because that affects your hair as well as the rest of your body. I don't know where I'd be if it weren't for sites like!

Its a journey but I love it. I stand out now. Guys actually approach me and compliment my hair more because I embrace all of me. Confidence is key. If you love your natural hair and yourself, nothing that anyone says can ever make you feel unpretty. :)

American Idol

I don't watch that show at ALL anymore.. I don't think I even watched the auditions last season. Anywho, apparently Kara Dioguardi(sp?) has been fired (woohoo) and Ellen Degeneres has "quit"... mmmmhmmmm and Jennifer Lopez is replacing her (word? She's like a younger/cuter/better Paul Abdul). So I never felt that Ellen should have been a judge to begin with. She isn't a singer.. She isn't a producer. She's just a fan like you and me who just so happens to be gay and have her own tv show and many fans. Now that Simon is gone too what's to come of the new Idol? Does anyone even care?? Who were the last few winners?? Yeah.. No one remembers them. Besides Carrie, Fantasia, Ruben, Jordin, Kelly and..... and Jennifer Hudson (who didnt win-- you go girl!) & the dude from Daughtry. Yeah fuck American Idol. Where is Paula Abdul?? Oh hey Randy (who for the longest I always thought was apart of the Jacksons-- the Michael/Janet Jacksons) bwahahahahaha!

♥ Bey & Jay

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

We're all going straight..

On Wednesday's We Wear...

I washed my hair Tuesday morning and decided that I wanted to do something different than my usual twist out & do a "braid out" instead. Umm huge fail! It was not defined at all. Huge, puffy and not wavy-- but i LOVED it. After I was outside and my hair soaked up the humid Texas air, It became a nice fro :) I like it. So if you want a nice fro try the braid out.. More defined curly/wavy hair- twist outs. Next I guess I can try the bantu knot out.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I told myself that I cant masturbate until I lose 10lbs (ive lose 4lbs so far) and I cant have sex until I lose 20lbs. Win/win?!

Monday, July 26, 2010

My Milkshake

Fuck My Exes

My love life sucks. Not because of the people in it presently (or lack there of) but mainly because of my PAST relationships. My exes seem to all want to string me along for the ride. I know you're thinking, "how many exes does Miss "I'm always single" have?" Well about a handful. None of my relationships lasted long so they all seem to be a blip in my mind until they try to reconnect. They're all supposedly in "love" now and so devoted to their current girlfriends but somehow they still want to bang me.

Yes, Bee--- I can't be their girlfriend now. I'm too much. But for some strange reason you keep coming back wanting to "see" me, wanting pics of me, wanting to smash the homie, wanting to see  how I am. Blah blah blah. I am your EX. I wasn't what you wanted or needed so you chose someone else.. WHY are you still on me? I don't even entertain it anymore. smh. carry the hell on.

I could so ruin or cause a strain if I forwarded these texts to your wifey but I won't. I'm erasing them. Fuck unsuspecting girlfriends who don't do shit when they find out their man is creeping because they really can't see themselves alone so they rather stick with a cheater. *sigh* You deserve him with your dumbasses.


Hair BEFORE using extra virgin olive oil (EVOO)

 Not much curl definition. Looks a bit dry and frizzy as hell.. smh

Hair AFTER EVOO was used:

you can actually see the individual curls for the most part.. Less frizzy. Not dry. Looks shiny. Go EVOO :)

My Current Twitter Bio

Now you're probably wondering why Pepper Ann?? Well I got tired of Sayuri and I loved the cartoon Pepper Ann growing up. Location? Well eventually I was somewhere over the rainbow but I figured that Santa's Lap was a far better place to be. I envisioned myself singing "Santa Baby" whilst sitting in Ol' St. Nick's lap and he's whispering in my ear like "Damn girlll..." okay maybe not but that does sound like a Holiday porno.
Umm I am Bee, and of course I'm vividly bland! Beyonce is my BFF... I don't see why that's so hard to believe. Of course I'm OBSESSED WITH DRIZZY DRAKE AKA DRAKKARDNOIR AKA AUBREY GRAHAM! lol I mean, my name is "Pepper Ann Graham". Smh. I am a veteran blogger. Been blogging since I rocked pigtails. Super Nova Girl is a shout out to Protozoa from Xenon in all her zoom zoom zoom glory. Cool to the max? The best phrase ever to come out of the valley.


Yay!!! Vividly Bland has 50 followers now! That's awesomery :)

Statistically speaking we pull about 200 individual viewers a day.. or some shit like that. I'm probably lying. That FAMU sextape hoax story gets a majority of those views. If you google FAMU SEXTAPE or any of the girls in the sextape, you get redirected here by google. Grrrr.... I hope you aren't expecting porn. *sigh* Sorry no more naked women.. just us half naked women.

Anywho, I have a favor to ask you guys. Umm, if you remember could you tell me how you heard about VB aka Vividly Bland aka my baby love??

That was pointless. No one ever comments. They just read this ish looking for something worth repeating and go on about their business. Some actually tweet me or text me like "Girl I read your blog.. You so crazy" and I'm like "thanks.. why didn't you leave a comment?" smh.

So yes, thanks to everyone who follows me & thanks to those who follow me but aren't visible. EVEN bigger thanks to those who just seem to know vividly bland by heart and come here out of their own free will. We appreciate you. Summer is almost over. Love. :)

Fire Crotch

Who are you Ricky?

Still don't know why Rick Ross would name his album after someone who was as racist as John Gotti.. smh. But then again I guess thats why after American Gangster came out every dude I knew was calling himself Frank Lucas. Everyone wants to seem bad ass. Rick Ross doesn't know who he wants to be. Scarface, Al Pacino, Rick Ross, The Teflon Don, Ricky Rozay, Nino... Every got damn body. Him so confused.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

The First Kiss

I miss the days when crazy makeout sessions in the backseat of cars was the norm. *sigh*

I remember my first kiss. I was in Pre-K. On the bus. Guy wanted to sit with me.. but my friend liked him and didn't want him to sit with me so she told me to come sit with her. I looked at her, then looked at him, then back at her and just shook me head "uh uh" and scooted over so he could sit down. I mean, he was the cutest guy in all of Pre-k and just moments earlier my "friend" told me she didn't want me to sit with her.. she wanted to sit by herself. Of course when he sat down with me she got jealous. She never spoke to me again. (This has shaped my relationship with all women... hehehe) This guy, cute as he was, was so happy that I let him sit with me that he kissed me on the hand then looked up at me with those pretty brown eyes. I died! I'm smiling now just thinking about it.

Then there was the first kiss with the guy I really liked... Who I thought I loved. It was in high school, last day of 9th grade and I came home after I took my finals and popped a bag of popcorn and put a few scoops of vanilla ice cream into another bowl. He came over, I went to put my food away and came back to find him going through my under drawer!!!!! Then he sat on my bed. I lay beside him then I sat on top of him. He then said "This is the first time we've ever been alone.." to which I replied "Yea but whose fault is that?" He smiled. I smiled. He looked at me. I looked at him. Then it happened- we kissed. Our first kiss. Our first time being alone. My first kiss in my room. Our first time. All in one day. *sigh*

And then there was my last first kiss. At least the last one that was memorable. Halloween 2008. I was a bee. I know you heard this story a million times but it meant the world to me. I know, I'm such a goober. Hush. Anywho for some strange reason my fishnets were ripped, my wings were droopy and the red cup I held in my hand was empty. My eyes were low, but I was feeling lovely and he was feeling me. Maybe it was because he was my friend who I'd secretly been crushing on forever or it was because he made some joke about cunnilingus earlier. Whatever. I was feeling good. Somehow he lead me outside and my drunk ass could barely walk straight. We ended up at his car. I really don't want to say too much because this can get a bit graphic but we ended up kissing like a bunch of high schoolers. People were walking past his car, some were even looking but I didn't care. We could have woohoo'd right then and there. I did not care. His lips just felt so right against mine. So soft. It was perfect. I still remember that as my last first kiss. All others just don't seem to compare. Mainly because I really really really liked him... and still do. *sigh*

My Eyes Are Green

At least that's what many guys think. You see, for the longest I wore green contacts. Acuvue colorblends. They actually looked REALLY natural on me.  Like they ACTUALLY fit me. I remember my first time walking on Morehouse campus this guy walked out of his way to come up to me and say "Excuse me but I really couldn't walk past you without saying you have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen". I simply smiled my Bee smile and said thanks as he walked away.

My roommate didn't know my eyes weren't green until she saw me taking out my contacts one night before bed. My first boyfriend in the A also didn't know my eyes weren't green until these guys had a bet and asked and I said "No" for like the first time EVER. smh.

Maybe its the color of my skin or my hair or maybe the shape of my eyes that made it seem believable that I had green eyes. Hell for the longest I actually forgot my eyes were big brown and beautiful instead of sultry & green.

My eyes are green because I eat alot of vegetables.. It has nothing to do with acuvue colorblends! *Erykah Badu voice*

So like I've been saying..

I've said this so many times before... I am a walking contradiction. *sigh* I say certain shit but I embody something totally different. Lately I've been debating the weave/contacts thing. I LOVE HAIR & I love my green eyes but I feel like I have a certain image to live up to. I should only wear my real hair now since I'm natural because if I don't then I am conforming to the white man's standard of beauty of the standards of beauty that society has created. *eye roll*. That if I get tired of dealing with my own hair daily, I cant grab a few bags of remy because I am denying my natural beauty. That I have low self esteem because I choose to wear makeup when I go out instead of rocking my discolored face raw & untouched.

Its a constant battle with MYSELF more than anything. I don't want people to ever say I hate myself because I love me. I really shouldn't care what others think but lets be honest, I kinda do. SMMFH.

I don't want to send out the wrong impression. I don't want to look like a hypocrite. I mean, the reason why I cut my hair short in the first place was because this guy I was with told me that I wouldn't look cute with short hair. That I needed long hair to be beautiful. He tried to break me. I vowed that I wouldn't let another guy break me again so I CUT my hair off. I stopped wearing weave for damn near a year. I stopped relaxing my hair.

I don't need some guy to validate shit for me. I don't need anyone too. Fuck it. I just had my own little epiphany. If I want to wear weave down to my ass I will. Lawd knows the next day I'm liable to take it out and unleash my fro. Why? Because Bee comes cute in every flavor. :)

Friday, July 23, 2010

Men = Snack Cakes

Today I was having a casual conversation with a guy and I uttered the all too familiar "Ugh, I hate men. You're ALL the same.." to which he replies "No we're not. I'm an individual." Of course me being the smart ass I respond back "Sure. Individually wrapped but still all the same." Get it? Like hostess snack cakes. They come individually wrapped but its still just like the other snack cake in the box. Men are like snack cakes. :)

The Queen Bee!

Beyoncé and myself could SO be sisters :) Look at our cheek bones & chins. Mathew Knowles is not my pappy though. John is my pappy.. but still Beyoncé Giselle & Brittney Michelle?? Yeah we match. 

Happy Friday :)

I'm Crazy

Aye Yo You...

Just so you know.. The next few posts will be from facebook. I used to write on their all the time before Vividly Bland became.. my baby :). Hope I haven't bored you but Bee was still quite interesting when she was known as Beezy. Hey, I even met a guy from my writing. He enjoyed that before he knew who I was. :) I still love that guy today. Well enjoy. ♥ Bee

Nocturnal Nymphomanical Nostalgia?

The title, means absolutely nothing. I just thought it was kinda cool to incorporate three N words.. You know since we've abolished it.

So its about 5am and I have alot on my mind. Listening to music brings out the um, creative side I suppose but not really.

As the days wind down and I am quickly approaching the day in which I shall finally be sleeping in the same room I slept in for sooo many years, I am kind of sad that TIME flies so fast.

My baby sister is now practically grown up almost. She looks so much like me, its crazy. I hope that she doesn't do half the things that I did while I was her age.
I was one wild kid. Ok, not wild, just a tad bit too free spirited.

I'm slowly getting back into that little free spirit thing.
I always say that I am not ready for a relationship but the more I think about it, I think that I'm lying to myself.. Like do I really just want to remain "just friends" or am I indeed looking for something more?

Maybe I am just afraid of letting someone in emotionally. You know, its better to keep your heart out of the equation and keep things on a pleasant and easy playing field versus putting yourself completely out there to possibly be hurt. I can't let that happen. I can't let someone make me feel like I see soo many other girls feel. I don't want to sit up in my room and cry because things just aren't working out.. Or devout so much of my time to this guy that once the relationship fails, I no longer know how to be a single person anymore because I wam so used to being a "WE".

So maybe I really should just spend more time with myself focusing on you know Me.. lol.
I'm such a mess.
I am truly a train wreck (shouts to Bey!)

I don't understand half of the things that come out of my own mouth so why should I expect anyone else to understand me??

Sometimes I think that I am a lttle too violent inside of my own head.
I may say things jokingly, but I believe I may have the mental stability of a serial killer.

The constant thoughts of being featured on an episode of Snapped on Oxygen or WE! or whatever channel its on, for Killing my husband who cheated or something.. Hmm.

Yes, maybe thats the problem.
I am crazy.
Dudes know i'm crazy.
You can tell by the way I look.
I never sleep.
I crave control.

Dreams of murdering people. So strange. Just like when I told that one guy that I had a list of over 101 ways to kill him and how I could do it without getting caught... he believed me. I indeed made a list.

Or the one time I held the screw driver up to his neck and told him that if he ever made me cry, i'd make HIM cry..

Or the time I started choking him, then freaked and apologized and he kicked me out his car.. after takin me home of course.


this sounds like the beginnings of a great novel.
Mentally unstable; the series.


Thursday, July 22, 2010

Sweet Sixteen

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.
(From Facebook over a year ago.. in 2008/2009)

1. I HATE to have my food touching each other on my plate. I know, its like all going to the same place and will get mixed up eventually but.. yeah, nothing is worse that SOGGY cornbread.

2. I always eat my french fries first whenever i order fast food cuz i hate cold fries.. They are disgusting. And fries are like my favorite food ever.. So if they are cold, i get pissed. And don't let them forget my ketchup.. i'll cut a bitch..

3. I was born with six fingers on each hand. My dad was born with an extra finger as well. I don't still have them but yeah, some people are grossed out by it.. I think its kinda cool, makes me feel a bit more special than everyone else.. The main reason why when everyone else only knew how to count to ten in spanish when we were in first grade, i could count to twelve :):)

4. I get annoyed VERY easily, especially when meeting new guys~ and its always the SAME questions. Ugh. You know the "So tell me about yourself.." How in the world am I supposed to tell you about myself in under a minute; and i say minute because we all know that most guys have short attention spans so things must be kept under sixty seconds or they'll just tune you out. AND i'm too BEEZY to be put in such a little box of words [mea, lmao] So i just tell them to read my blog. You can figure me out more by what I write than what I could ever tell you. Most dudes just say fuck it and move on lol

5. I hate when people try to hook me up with people. It makes me feel like I'm desperate or something.. I mean, I know my love life is pretty shitty but they always try to tell me who they THINK i'd be perfect with, and they are soo wrong. Especially when its like my gal pal's guy friend's friend who is nowhere near my type.. yuck.

6. I never sleep. I mean, I do sleep alot.. But I go through periods where I stay up all night and only nap during the day.. Then there is this weird time where I sleep ALL day long.. IDK why. I guess when my body is just tooo tired, It crashes. And nobody can wake me up. Not even for food. I even slept thru thanksgiving.

7. As you probably already know, I want to write novels. I'm working on one now. Someone said I should do urban writing, you know the Terry McMillan's and whatnot.. I could do it. Have you heard my stories from high school alone?! uhh yeah.. definitely a made for tv movie. Can we say Lifetime MOvie network?

8. I'm the oldest girl in my family. So I have some very boy like qualities. Its kind of sad when you think about it. My cousin had to sit me down and tell me that I'm not a BOY.. Way before Ciara & Beyonce came out with those songs.. But anywho, I grew up around all guys and have had the WORST relationships with girls- EVER. Which is why I have sooo many guy friends and dude usually enjoy conversing with me.. :) yeahh i'm such a GOOD catch.

9. In addition to my extra fingers, I have a third nipple. Called a supernumerary or accessory nipple. Doesn't look like a nipple at all actually. More of a mole.. thats directly below my boobs on the "milk line". Maybe I have so much extra ish going on because I was supposed to have a twin.. or i was kinda overdue.. or i'm just that darn Special :)

10. I love cartoons. I often get into arguments with my guy because if i'm spending time with him, i HAVE to watch my cartoons. It gets really serious. Me and my roommate had the best time ever because we BOTH loved watchin cartoons in the morning while gettin ready for class.. Made many HH Penthouse girls mad because Spongebob was loud from 6-9am daily. lmao

11. Baking is a gift of mine.. My mother has recipe books lying around with the old recipes and we usually make whatever they are and tweak the recipes a little to improve them. I spend hours looking up different recipes until i get it right. Like just now, I perfected the sugar cookie. Yes I am badass in the kitchen. How domesticated am I?! Ha!

12. I absolutely LOVE Beyoncé!!! Its kinda crazy.. If you've ever been to my house, you'd know that the walls were once covered with Beyoncé/Destiny's Child/Solange pictures.. Yes even Solange because she is simply Beyoncé's younger sister. I am borderlined obsessed. In high school, to get the parties started, my friends would put on a Beyoncé song and make me perform the dance sequence from the Video for everyone. Yes I know the WHOLE "Single Ladies" dance. I also know the routines to "Crazy In Love", "Baby Boy", "Déjà vu", "Ring the Alarm", "Get Me Bodied", and now i'm perfecting "Diva". LOL. So whenever I hear those songs.. sometimes I can't help BUT to dance my little ass off. hehehe :)

13. I hate authority. I hate people telling me what I can and can not do which is why life at Spelman was so baffling to me freshman year. Who are they to tell me when I can or can not have visitors?! Hahaha.. crazy. I do things sometimes just to prove a point. Like when my mother told me that I couldn't talk to boys, of course I did. And when they told me not to drink.. eh duh i did. Or to not go out to the club.. haha, yeahh so did that too. I know this isn't a GOOD thing, but still. I feel like I have the right to do certain things if it doesn't harm anyone.

14. I was in girl scouts for like 7 years. and I LOVED it. I really miss it. I made it all the way to Cadette Scout. I was soo excited because we got to wear the khaki uniform with the sash that tied at the end with the little blue collar shirts. So Spiffy!! My daughters will most definitely be in GS as freaking Daisy Scouts. And my sons boy scouters, whether they like it or not! I can tie the best square knot you've ever seen.. Slip Knot?! no problema..

15. I'm addicted to purple & black things. If you saw my room.. you'd know that without even thinkin, I bought things that were purple without even realizing it. Lotions, cleaning products, body spray, etc.. Everything was purple. My notebook was purple. Its sickening. And ever since I was like in 8th grade I've always bought black clothing.. Shirts, pants, skirts, shoes EVERYTHING. Paired with my usual heavy eyeliner, people would think that I was gothic or something. No, i just LOVE black stuff. I try to buy things that aren't black or purple ... but I can't help it. I always resort back to my safety colors. lol

16. I have the worst relationships with guys EVER. If its anything beyond friendship, its doomed to fail. Seriously.. I have NO idea why. I even moved away from my usual "type" and still no success. I haven't given up on guys.. I just found it quite interesting that I pick the WRONG ones. And usually the guys that I really REALLy like have girlfriends. So typical of me. i kinda think that i WANT all my relationships to fail or have problems just so i have something to write about.. You know how like Keyshia Cole first couple of albums were the best ever because she was talkin bout fail'd relationships and guys doin her wrong and blah blah blah & everybody was LOVING her. Now she's all happy & its like eh, wtf?! the same with Mary J. Blige. I don't care bout how happy you are, i'm NOT. smh.. lol

Now, I'm pretty sure that you've NEVER read a note as good as mine.. This is the best 16 EVER. lol:)

(Eight + Twelve) X Five / ( Four ) +One Quirky Tidbits about Bee

(Eight + Twelve) X Five / ( Four ) +One Quirky Tidbits about Bee (From facebook notes)

Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

*** I really didn't want to do this because I've already did the Sweet 16 one, and this is basically the same damn thing.. I think its silly but of course I got into it as always.. I don't understand why i actually read every person who tagged me in their note's 25 facts smh. so read.. enjoy.. ***

One. It took me almost ten minutes to come up with the title for this stupid ass note.

Two. I thought i was going "natural" but now I have finally realized that I'm just gonna grow out my hair & get weave soon.. But i'm not getting a relaxer anymore.. Only because I have these cool spiral curls in the back of my head and they aren't really tight.. kinda loose.

Three. I've had a blog since 2003. I was a freshman in high school. It was actually an online diary account on My last entry dates back to 2006. From there I moved on to my myspace blog and eventually my blogspot which I started senior year. That's the main reason why I hate that everyone and there kid sister has a blog. Or maybe I'm just jealous. For that reason I'm not broadcasting it ANYMORE.

Four. In kindergarten I won first place in our "Fun Run", which was this mile long race that everyone took place in. I wore mary janes that day & a red plaid pant suit jumper ensemble. I have a picture. Horrible. That was the last time I won a blue ribbon for something athletic.

Five. In third grade, every girl in my P.E. class (which was like 6 different classes) either hated me or was my friend. That was the ongoing battle that year. It got so bad that the P.E. coach had a sit down with every girl (kinda like in mean girls) and made us talk out our problems. It was revealed that every girl said that I "thought I was all that because I had a big booty.." I really think Tina Fey wrote that script about me and not some book.

Six. I know random songs & random movies & random facts about random things.. If you start singing a song or ask me about it (SAM) 90% of the time i know it.. I even play the lyrics game with my cousin ** you text a song lyric and then the other person has to guess the artist/song it comes from & vice versa** People often call me to settle disagreement on song lyrics or text me wanting to know why we say " .. and to the republic.." in the pledge of allegiance.. and how to spell random words. :)

Seven. I think of my life as Pre-fat Brittney, Fat Brittney, Skinny Brittney, Chubby Brittney & now.. Those years are birth-4th grade, 5th & 6th grade, 7th-11th grade, 12th grade, & college life (now)

Eight. I'm obsessed with asians. I really think that i'm part asian, mainly because a handful of people have been saying that I look asian for years. But i don't see it. Unless i have blunt bangs and heavy eyeliner. whew. but seriuosly, when i see asian people i smile. i think i wanna marry an asian/black guy..

Nine. Call me weird or gross but I actually like when i have dandruff. Like its disgusting but I will take a comb and scratch until i see white flakes fall onto my desk, shirt or whatever's in front of me..

Ten. Slowly but surely I'm turning anti-social. If i could I'd stay in my room all day staring at the wall or writing. Alot of times I ignore texts or calls just because... I actually don't like people.. or crowds.. I can count all of my friends on one hand. Just enough fingers to slap a bitch with. If you have a plethora of friends.. or a gaggle of friends.. or a slew of friends.. chances are they really don't "like" you.. eliminate people and life will be ohh so much better.

Eleven. To date I've been featured on at least ten different sites. Unfortunately they've only been negative tidbits. When I become famous I know those stories will be in the National Enquirer.

Twelve. I have the two lamest, most common, and corniest tattoos ever but I don't care.. I think my butterfly and stars are cute. My next tat is going to be three bumble bees on my back with the dotted trail behind them. After that i'm getting a smiley face on my collar bone. Then I'm getting a monkey swinging from a vine eating a banana on my side/hip. And i just came up with the last two right now...

Thirteen. I’m very sensitive. I only cry when I’m really upset or mad, not sad. When I’m sad I’m usually in a corner somewhere or by myself.. Which is why I hate confronting people because my first reaction is to cry (mea, megan, jamiere ahem…)

Fourteen. Everyone who knows me thinks that I’m weird. I’m not like anyone in my family. They are all pretty normal, others say.. But I don’t think I’m weird.. I’m just different I guess.. like everyone else. Which means I’m not different at all.

Fifteen. I cant hide my feelings or what I’m thinking for that matter.. When I’m in church and people are testifying of preaching a sermon I often find myself smirking, shaking my head, rolling my eyes or giving them the WTF?! Face.. I know its wrong and all but come on now! You KNOW they be lying!! Hahahaha.. If I think something is just stupid, my face reads STUPID. I think I was supposed to be a cartoon character instead of a human. Smh.

Sixteen. I’m fascinated with boobs.. mainly my own. And they’re not even big but I often stare at them or look at them in the mirror. I think having boobs has to be the BEST part about being a girl.

Seventeen. I’m the messiest person EVER but I hate dirtyness. It’s the worst way to be because I throw things all over the place but I HATE for my carpet to be dirty. I leave hair in my sink.. but I hate for there to be hair there. I can’t focus when my bed is messy but I hate to make it up. I'm just live a contradicting lifestyle

Eighteen. I had perfect 20/20 vision until seventh grade. This all happened at girl scout camp.. You see, I was spraying myself with bug spray and accidentally sprayed myself in the eyes.. Ever since them I’ve been blind as a bat. I only wore glasses for one year. By 8th grade I had contacts.
***I've had green contacts since freshman year. I only got them because every other black girl in my school either had Honey, Hazel or Grey.. I thought I was being "different" by getting green. Soon after everyone followed suit.. smh***

Nineteen. I know this sounds silly but I hate shopping. I hate trying on clothes. I hate walking through the mall for hours. Usually I only go to the mall to visit the food court. Yes I will really take the marta to lenox or perimeter to get Malibu or Mango chicken.

Twenty. I never forgive people. I know its wrong not to but I cant help it. Once you fuck me over once I'm secretly plotting revenge in my head. I can hold a grudge for years. I actually cant remember why I don’t like some people now.. oh yeah, I do remember. Example A: this girl spread rumors about me freshman year.. I was pissed. But I didn’t do anything bout it. The next yr she thought we were friends and asked for my advice on getting back at this guy.. stupidest question ever. So I told her to do the most awful thing ever.. she did it. People started talkin bout her really bad. I almost ruined her life.. at least her relationship with him. Ha.

Twenty one. I suffer from old lady syndrome. I keep my window open all day & listen to people’s conversations outside.. I don’t know them or the people they’re talkin bout but I just like to listen. I gossip all the time. I know everyone’s business. But I never spill it. I just like knowing things about people.

Twenty two. I post stupid videos on youtube and random people leave me messages asking for advice. I actually respond to them. I’m super friendly to strangers… its strange. I’m a bitch in real life.

Twenty three. I’m the butchiness straight girl ever.. I think. I can push cars by myself with people in them while its raining, I can build tables and chairs, I can fix random things around the house, I can knock over vending machines to get stuck snacks out, I can carry large heavy boxes filled with cleaning supplies by myself, I can move furniture by myself.. basically I’m like the guy around the house without a tool belt. Sad thing is I have NO muscle definition in my arms but I’m strong as hell. Scary.

Twenty four. I hate it when random people think they know me and my whole life story just because they read my blog, notes, status.. etc.. Someone read my blog and noticed that my father wasn’t mentioned at all so they sent me a message asking what problems did I have with him.. I rarely talk about my family unless its really funny or I’m pissed. I actually found an entry where my father was mentioned. He was stupid.

Twenty five. I can count the number of times I’ve been in trouble at school. In elementary it was because I jumped off the see saw and the chick on the other end hit the ground so hard her ass was throbbin so I had to sit out in recess.. The next time was sixth grade when this high schooler was picking on my little brother so I punched him & called him a bitch.. the bus driver didn’t see the punch but heard the bitch so I was suspended from the bus for three days. In high school I actually be late for class so that I’d get detentions and had a reason to stay after school just so I could be around the varsity boys after practice Oh yeah, and I always got in trouble for dress code only because I refuse to listen to some lady tell me that my skirt is only too short in the back because I have junk in my trunk.

Twenty six. I hate seeing misspelled words.. I mean, its okay to leave the ends of words off from time to time, I do it too.. but when you’re writing a status and use a “big” word like copacetic and spell it coppastetic I get pissed. Or spell INDEPENDENT with an A(mea.. lmao). I mean, don’t broadcast that.. keep it to yourself. ..

Oh yeah I wrote twenty six because two + six = eight.. and eight is my favorite number ..

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

kudos to bee

I haven't called or text Mr. Good Peen all day.. actually I haven't texted him in awhile. I'm doing good. So proud of myself :)


My bff Brooke and I were going through someone's pics on facebook and noticed a trend--- awful predictable poses. So we mocked her. If you pose like this, sorry. This is a trend-ender post. Some are cute though.. let's see if you can tell which ones were for fun :)

Ugh.. I'm a bitch, she's a bitch, you're a bitch-- cuz we're all bitches!