Saturday, March 3, 2012

Bland Blues

shit never changes. always stays the same. I often wonder what the heck I’m doing with my life. To be so close yet so distant is what my heart has been cursed with. I just expected things to change… one day. I thought that if I convinced him to leave her, he would eventually be with me. Ha. funny. I also thought that if I got my own place he’d want to be around me more. If he got to know me he’d finally see how awesome I am. He’d see shit that other guys see. Why can’t he see that shit. Oh the life of Bee. So fuckin depressing at times.
Kind of sad that my friends don’t like it when I’m locked away in my room for long periods of time because they see how “sad” I am. I refuse to say depressed but that may be a better word for how they feel about my situation.
I guess this has to be my outlet for now. Don’t want people to fear the worst. Or be worried that I may attempt suicide. I’ve loved & I’ve lost but.. I will win again. One day.
How do you make someone fall in love with you? Waiting on mother nature to do things for me isn’t working. Cupid was just another caucasian asshole. I cant kidnap him. *sigh* what ever will Brittney do man.

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